This blog isn't a new one, but I had deleted the previous posts due to some reasons. For those who had read my posts before, I am sure you all know what I had been through lately, especially from the beginning of the year. It wasn't easy for me to get through all of that. I had been standing all these pain, holding back my tears and telling myself that it will be okay. After getting hurt again and again, I don't know if I can stand back up again, and keep on smiling like how I used to. No matter what happened in the past, I'm going to let them be, and no matter what happen in the future, I'm going to face all of them by myself. Today, I'm strong enough to do so.
'Nicole Choon. I like the way you used to be'. I'm sorry. I know I did change a lot ever since the heart-breaking incident. I was trying to hide my feelings and showing the others that I'm okay. I wanted to tell people that I'm strong, and that it was not a big deal to me, and I could get back up without depending on anyone. No matter how hard I cried at night, I told myself that it would be just fine in the next morning. I smiled to my friends, but I was hurt deeply in my heart. I wanted to be happy and forget all my past. Everything in the past was too painful to remember. I tried to make myself happy, that was my intention. However, I realize that no matter what I do, nothing can be changed. I just need more time to get things right, I am really sorry to make you all worry, especially my family and best friends. Cindy is my best friend. She is here no matter what happens to me. At the moment I hug her, there must be something wrong. She is the one whom I can depend on. I really appreciate her really much for these years. She has been seeing me getting hurt, 'You know it isn't easy for me, Cindy'.
But today, I'm here. I love myself more now. I learn how to appreciate those who treat me truly. I know what are my priorities now, and I know what I really want. I know that I have disappointed many of you. I'm sorry. Nicole is going to be back, just awhile more, she will.
Finally you're back!. I've been waiting for you to came back. The things you've been through will only make you stronger, it will worth it. Everything happens for a reason,and this may be a challenge god gave to you to make you stronger on the inside and the outside. I can see you now heading towards a happier life, and indeed you will get what you want in future. Lots of love to you. I love you.
ReplyDeleteI love you Cindy. Sorry to disappoint you. Actually you know I have not fully recovered from my past, but it is true that I have become stronger. Thanks for being here with me kay. I appreciate what you have done for me, and I'm sure better ones are yet to come. I'm back this time, really back!
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